Let’s grab some tea – or coffee, hot cocoa, even – and have a chat. How are you holding up?
It’s been awhile since the old “normal” for many of us. I’ve lost count of what day into Social-Distancing/Stay-at-Home orders we’re in, but I think it is somewhere around the 40 day mark (here, at least). The Introvert in me – or the burnt out graduate student, it’s hard to tell – has been grateful for this time at home. This time has been more than I’ve had in the three years of our graduate program to be home, surrounded by my parents, my chickens, my furchild. It’s also the most ‘downtime’ I’ve had in years. (I’ve read five leisure books, indulged in yard work, begun to organize and downsize accumulated items and papers, and still had time to study for boards.) My gratitude for this time is overflowing. I’d been feeling the need to hit a pause button strongly since January; this time at home has fulfilled that.
(This year I’ve been feeling as if the energy was being sucked out of me. One Tarot card that always shows up for me is the Hermit. And this year I’ve been pulled toward that more than ever. Let me wrap myself in blankets, in a dimly lit room, essential oils diffusing, and soothing music in the background, with limited interactions required, so that I may rejuvenate. At first, I thought it was my Introvert coming out to play. Now, I think it was a little self-soothing for a burnt-out soul.)
It’s strange to simultaneously feel an overwhelming weight of anxiety, concern, and grief for the world at large right now and a return to rejuvenation due to a pause. I recognize, as well, that, there is an immense amount of privilege and circumstance allowing me to relax during this time. The respite comes with a bittersweet edge. So, I’ve been counting my blessings, saying my gratitude list, donating where and when I can, kept my eyes open for where I can stand with others against injustice when this is all through (or from a safe distance currently), and praying for those who aren’t in the position I am in and those on the front lines. A social and health crisis truly brings to light the disparities in our society which we may otherwise turn a blind eye to. I’d like to hope that these events will make us fight harder to alleviate those disparities when we all emerge.
After this musing, before I jump into this post, I want to ask: What small joy are you cherishing today? What is a profound insight you’ve had since Stay-at-Home orders/Social Distancing took hold? What are you most looking forward to when things reopen and return to normal?
Let me know in the comments! ❤︎
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Recently, I was talking to a few friends and we were sharing how one of the hardest parts of social distancing for us is the lack of our traditional community. We’re all lucky – we’ve got jobs that can occur primarily from home, student loans to support us, or family we can live with – our concerns are fewer than some. Yet, the comforts of a weekly coffee with friends at a favorite coffee shop, hiking adventures with friends, weekly community dinners or game nights, or hugging a loved one are missed with a weight that keenly strikes the heart. The loss of community is a void that is hard to fill.
During my minor in Holistic Health, our professors repeatedly emphasized that there is no separation between emotional, mental, or physical well-being. In the West, we often separate the mind, body, and soul. Yet, in many cultures, they are inseparable. Our mental-emotional state affects our physical state and vice versa. Anyone who has suffered with pain associated with depression, for example, knows how true this can be. Emotions are intricately connected to our well-being. Research has indicated a relationship between happiness and the immune system. In research, individuals who are experiencing positive emotions tended to have a stronger immune response or resilience to pathogens. Even in older populations, a strong social network in combined with keeping mentally active has been associated with the potential reduction in risk of Alzheimers and Dementia, which is why organizations like The Senior Center are important for seniors who may not have other social support.
Having a strong sense of community in spite of the weight of this pandemic is important for our mental-emotional-physical well-being. Without it, we feel lonely and disconnected. Beyond the mental-emotional ramifications of loneliness and isolation, the emotions are associated with a wide variety of health problems including high blood pressure, diminished immunity, cardiovascular disease and cognitive decline.
The bottom line is that right now, during a time of so much fear, grief, confusion, and loneliness, we need community more than ever. A social support system – a community – is important for our health. Social distancing does n o t mean emotional distancing. We don’t need to toss out community – just redefine how we form that sense of community.
I’ve compiled a list of ideas about how to create a sense of community during this time. Some are my ideas, some are friends’. Others are from viewing local communities. It is by no means a complete list. For instance, some of these ideas require the internet or an exchange of money. I’d love to see ideas from individuals who are aware of how a sense of community is being maintained in under-served populations or areas that do not have access to the internet.
Be creative, come up with some of your own ideas! Then, share them below in the comments for others who might be interested.
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- Online Yoga Classes. During this time, every Friday after 8pm my sweet friend Giselle from Trove of the Sacred is holding a virtual yoga class on Instagram Live.
This sweet yogi is a future chiropractor and acupuncturist who teaches a yoga experience that balances mindfulness with strength building, support and comfort with challenge. Her courses are fun, vibrant, restorative, and encourage you to come to the mat as yourself – every time. Everyone’s yoga practice should be comfortable and unique to their individual abilities and she believes that.
She is currently offering an All-Levels Online Yoga Class for $10 or a set of 4 ZOOM recorded yoga classes, appropriate for all levels, for $30. Pop on over to her website to find out more! You can also follow her on Instagram or Facebook. (Interested in her class bundle? Use coupon code “JOYFUL” to get 10% off!).- Giselle also has a variety of other classes you can participate in, such as: sacred bowl yoga, bleed yoga to support you during your period, and a free sacred bowl meditation .
- Moon Circles. On the New Moon and the Full Moon, Giselle Foss holds a circle which you can participate in. Curious and want to know more? Follow her on Instagram at trove.of.the.sacred to get the latest updates!.
- Life’s Library. This was an idea from Vlogbrothers. The purpose of Life’s Library is to have a community to read books and thoughtfully discuss them with. While there is a subscription you can pay for, in order to receive the books, but the discussion boards are free!
- FaceTime/Skype/Zoom. From a weekly check-in with friends, Virtual Birthday Parties to game nights, virtual Paint Nights, virtual baking sessions, book clubs, knitting sessions, happy hours, and more, these platforms make it easy to connect with one another. With them, the sting of distance doesn’t burn so intensely. (Psst! Check in with your local library and town parks & rec, too! A few are holding weekly trivia via Zoom or weekly webinars on topics of interest, such as gardening or backyard chickens.)
- Book Clubs. Speaking of Facetime/Skype/Zoom book clubs, some friends of mine are all choosing to read the same books (if we own them) or read books in the same genre (ex. Historical fiction, romance, fantasy…) and then discuss them via phone calls, Facetime, or text. You could also play it in a modified Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society-style and all read different books accessible to you (via your home library, online library, audiobooks, what-have-you) and pitch them to each other in a means to try to convince one another how great (or awful) the book is. If you all read the same book, and can meet in a manner that allows you to hear one another, I highly recommend “30 second” or “1 minute” recaps. They are a super playful way to be a little competitive. Harry Potter and the Sacred Text podcast does this for every chapter of Harry Potter and it is always a hoot! Everyone’s story telling personality always comes out.
- Spin-off Idea: You could also have a “Podcast Group” where you discuss the same or different favorite podcasts.
- Facebook Goups. I am avoiding too much time on social media right now for my mental health, but in many communities there are groups forming that are centered around providing support and giving.
- A few Maine Groups include:
- Create a group with your friends!
- HouseParty App – Another friend of mine called this “facetime, but for games!” I haven’t used it yet, but that is one heck of a pitch. Especially if, like me, you seem to no longer have an actual board games in the house so having a virtual game night is pretty much impossible.
- “Legit Old School Phone Calls” – One of my friends, Jen, shared this with me recently when I asked how she maintaining a sense of community. My mom and I have been really enjoying this, too, with friends and family. Just last night I talked with my roommate for a few hours via the phone! ❤︎
- Weekly “Girl’s Night” – Two friends of mine and I have taken advantage of this opportunity to schedule in a weekly Girl’s Night. We determined that Thursday nights fit both into our schedule – even from now until the end of the summer – so we’ve penciled it in as a weekly get together. This is probably the most connected I’ve been to friends in years! Some of my friends and I are using Zoom, some of us are using Facetime or Facebook messenger video. Whatever it takes to keep in touch!
- A fun add to this would be a weekly Dinner with Friends. You all cook your dinner and then meet up on Zoom, Facetime, Skype, whatever you need to use to meet up on… and catch up on life, talk about hopes and dreams, concerns and fears, latest reads or watches – anything. 🙂
- Write that novel with the friend you’ve always wanted to (thanks to Google Docs that is super easy!).
- Send emails back-and-forth with a dear friend – Did anyone love having pen pals as a kid? This is a great time to bring back that joy we felt when opening a mailbox as kids to find a new letter. (If you send letters, make sure they & you are careful with disinfecting or leaving the letters in a secluded area for a period of time before handling. COVID-19 lives on paper for several days. We don’t want to spread to others!)
- Socially Distanced Walking. Meeting up with a friend or family member for a walk in your neighborhood or on open trails, as long as 6-foot distance is maintained, is a great way to enjoy fresh air, get some Vitamin D, keep active, and enjoy the presence of a loved one.
- Online Yoga Classes. During this time, every Friday after 8pm my sweet friend Giselle from Trove of the Sacred is holding a virtual yoga class on Instagram Live.
Keep striving to find ways to bring community into your little corner of Social Distancing.
Stay safe!
xoxo,
Great list of ideas for everyone <3